Man's Best Friend ? Whatever!

"Feeling so groggy still!"

Well thanks a lot, people! that is sarcasm if you were wondering. I actually managed to escape butcher's clutches, find a computer, and make a cry for help on this page. Does anyone respond?...NO! I'm sure if I would have been able to use twitter someone MAYBE would have come. Unfortunately, twitter was blocked at that particular office...figures. I really didn't expect much from most of you out there. But Chrissy?! I thought you would really come through for me. I am sooooo disappointed. well, my anesthesia is still weighing me down, so in a very high pitch voice, I say - goodnight until next time...

this is your friendly, local vet

Please ignore the rantings posted on this site earlier by Gandalf. He was very stressed out and delusional. I asure everyone that we will be taking good care of Gandalf during his stay with us and will not harm him in any way. Gandalf is currently unavailable for comment at this time, as he was extremely anxious and required a sedative to calm him down. Rest asured, though, Gandalf will be a new man when he leaves our facility. Thank you for your concern in this matter.

PLEASE, SOMEONE HELP ME!!!!!

I am posting this from the office of the people that are trying to turn me into a eunich. I have escaped their grips, but I have been unable to find my way out of this building. They are hot on my trail, so if anyone is getting this cry for help then come to the animal hospital on Peart Rd. For the love of all that is good, please come and rescue me from these people. Chrissy, where are you???? Oh no, I can hear them coming. I'm cornered. NO, no, no, no, no....aghhhhhhhhh....................

Week 4 - Tuesday

Well, apparently, I have upset my masters too many times. I over heard them talking about taking me to the vet to have something called nuetering done to me. I wasn't sure what this was, so i started inquiring about it. When I spoke to Gomez, he informed me that this was the proceedure that he underwent to become a eunich. So needless to say I have not been feeling real great about things lately. I have tried to be extra good as well as extra cute, but to no effect. I am being taken to the chopping block tomorrow.

As for other news, i have been trying to be a little more sociable with the cats of the house and it seems to be working a little. Gomez and I have been getting along for some time now, but the other cats were not as accepting as he. Wednesday has been a bit more receptive lately, though she does seem to still be a little standoffish. Grandmama, on the other hand, is still not usually very friendly with me. However, I did find some common ground with her. We both enjoy looking out the window and dreaming of running free (but both of us want to be able to return here of course). We just wish to be able to come and go as we please. We even attempted to escape together. Unfortunately we were both caught before we could get very far. Once out the door, Grandmama got a little rattled and froze. I was caught because of my uncontrolable urge to pee on everything. Oh well, maybe next time. well untill next time...

week 3 - tuesday

Well, it's been a good few days since my last post. I am now on day 6 without any excrement incidents in the house. i am hoping to get some of my freedom back soon, but my masters seem skeptical about giving me too much freedom too soon again. I'll just keep on trying to prove myself and hope that they learn to trust me once again.

Today was quite interesting. I decided to go and visit an elderly woman that lives down the street. Her door was open and she was quite happy to have the company. We had a very nice time together. Well, apparently my masters are extremely needy. I was only gone for a few minutes and these people start a manhunt. I mean seriously people, don't you think you over reacted just a bit. When you guys leave, do you see me calling everyone I know while on the verge of tears and then start talking about how it couldn't be possible that you just left and start dreaming up horriffic scenarios like giant, evil birds that must have swooped down and eaten you. It's kind of disturbing. Anyway, lesson learned...I'll start checking in everytime I want to do anything and you'll just keep leaving me in the dark (double standard but i guess I'll have to learn to live with it). Well until next time...

week 2

Well this week was interesting to say the least. it started out with the introduction of another human into the house. she is apparently Sam's sister, Christa. They brought her home and had a day of celebration the next day with numerous humans gathered in the house to gorge themselves on pie. I do not believe anything healthy was eaten by a human in this house all that day. It was the definition of glutony, once again showing how amazing it really is that humans are masters of us beasts.

Once the day of glutonous mutilation of the human's bodies was over they packed up and left the next morning. My masters left Chrissy to house sit and watch over us animals (you know in case we decided to do anything that could result in harming ourselves...such as eating more pie in one day than should probably be consumed in a lifetime!). Well, it turns out that Chrissy used to pay quite a bit of attention to the cats before I came along. On this occassion, though, she was totally smitten by my puppy charm. This angered the cats greatly. Chrissy paid very little to no attention at all to these lesser beings and worshiped me, as it should be! The cats did, however, get their revenge on Chrissy and I. Things happened so fast that I don't even know fully what happened, but somehow they convinced me that since everyone else gets to relieve themselves in the house, that I should claim my right to do the same. They said it was my God given right. Well, I fell for it and Chrissy did not discover this error in judgement until my masters returned. It was Sam, in fact that discovered my dirty little protest. Chrissy felt bad for the incident, even though it had nothing to do with her, and I am more restricted in my freedoms than ever. And all the while, the truely guilty ones roam free and unpunished! But make no mistake, I will have my revenge and it will be sooooo SWEET!

Since then, I have turned over a new leaf. It has been 3 full days without a excrement incident in the house. The masters have expressed their gratitude for this numerous times. The cats have tried to egg me on to failure but it is them that will fail in this endevour. Christa has since left and the house has gone back to almost normal, but it appears that the humans are preparing for yet another feast. If these people aren't a little less festive they just might not be around to take care of me. Apparently, this time, they are celebrating the birth of the human, James. Interesting ritual, especially when being observed by someone that doesn't even know how old he is. Well, I have to be going now. I have an evil plan to create and implement upon some deserving felines. Here kitty, kitty, kitty...whahahahahahaha!